Jaguar Growler and Sinkholes in Wales
To the Editor
I write to you today with a mixture of bemusement, curiosity, and the faint smell of exhaust fumes, as I attempt to untangle two events that seem to have absolutely no connection — unless, of course, they do. I refer, naturally, to the launch of Jaguar’s new car and brand, which some are calling "woke," and the sudden appearance of a rather substantial sinkhole outside a house in Merthyr Tydfil.
The Jaguar launch, I am told, is a bold step into a future filled with sustainability, inclusion, and, perhaps, an electric motor or two. But some critics are growling louder than the old petrol engines ever did, claiming that Jaguar has gone "woke" by daring to appeal to modern sensibilities. What this means, exactly, remains unclear. Are the tyres now vegan? Does the satnav politely avoid roads with contentious history? Or is it simply that the car plays protest songs on Spotify when idling?
Meanwhile, in Merthyr Tydfil, the ground itself has opened up — possibly in protest at something or nothing at all. A sinkhole, as dramatic as any Jaguar launch but far less polished, has appeared outside someone’s house. Naturally, I am left wondering: was the sinkhole caused by vibrations from the Jaguar's new marketing strategy, or is it merely a metaphor for the collapse of traditional values in luxury car branding?
The sinkhole, much like the reaction to the Jaguar, raises more questions than answers. Is it a naturally occurring event, or is it a covert attempt by the Earth to get in on the sustainability conversation? Could it be an early adopter of the "woke" ethos, making way for an underground charging station? Or is it just a big hole, as indifferent to cultural debates as my cat is to climate change?
In closing, I must ask: are we too quick to label innovation as "woke" or sinkholes as acts of rebellion? Perhaps the true lesson here is that the world is always shifting — whether it’s the priorities of car manufacturers or the literal ground beneath our feet.
Yours in amused confusion and cautious parking,
A Slightly Unsettled Observer of Both Jaguars and Geological Events