In Celebration of the World Cheese Championships
To the Editor,
I write with both uncontainable excitement and mild indifference regarding the recent announcement of the World Cheese Championships to be held in Portugal. This news has set my heart ablaze with joy, though I must question whether it is even appropriate to care. After all, is cheese not just fermented milk, or is it something far more profound?
Portugal, a land renowned for its custard tarts and sardines, is clearly the only logical choice for such a competition. Except, of course, when one considers France, Italy, or the Swiss Alps — each far more suited, though significantly less fitting. One might ask, why Portugal?
The Championships themselves promise to be a spectacular showcase of dairy-based brilliance. Brie will battle blue cheese, cheddar will contend with camembert, and gouda — oh, the gouda! —shall undoubtedly emerge victorious, unless it doesn’t.
How thrilling it is to imagine these wedges and wheels of wonder vying for supremacy, even as I ponder whether they care at all about winning. Does a wheel of cheese know it’s in Portugal? Does it dream of gold medals?
And what of the judges? Heroes or villains, depending on the strength of the rind and the pungency of the aroma. They will taste and decide, though I suspect their decisions will be both correct and utterly meaningless, as all cheese is both good and bad, depending on whether one is eating it or simply smelling it.
Yours with equal measures of delight and doubt,
A Curious Connoisseur of the Curious