Darts and Wet Wellies
To the Esteemed Editor,
Congratulations to young Luke Littler for defying physics, logic, and perhaps even gravity by hurling pointy objects with such precision as to become the youngest PDC World Darts Champion at the tender age of 17. Seventeen! At that age, I was still trying to work out which end of a biro to write with and whether jam sandwiches counted as haute cuisine.
However, I do have concerns about this darting prodigy. Does he aim so well because he, too, fears the existential dread of soggy feet? This brings me to a critical matter: my wellies. As I prepare for my morning constitutional, I can't help but ponder the state of their rubber integrity. Will they hold firm against the puddles of fate, or shall I return with socks as sodden as a discarded tea bag?
Perhaps Luke’s triumph is a sign we should all recalibrate our targets in life. If a teenager can achieve darting immortality, surely I can hope for dry toes and an untroubled stride. Unless, of course, this is all part of some cosmic joke — one where young Luke takes the glory while I take a squelchy detour through an unexpected bog.
Yours in darting admiration and waterproof anticipation,
PH Gew
(Proud Welly-Wearer and Philosopher of the Puddle)